All or Nothing Read online




  A Total-E-Bound Publication

  www.total-e-bound.com

  All or Nothing

  ISBN # 978-1-907280-07-8

  ©Copyright Jessica Jarman 2009

  Cover Art by Lyn Taylor ©Copyright September 2009

  Edited by Christine Allen-Riley

  Total-E-Bound Publishing

  This is a work of fiction. All characters, places and events are from the author’s imagination and should not be confused with fact. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, events or places is purely coincidental.

  All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced in any material form, whether by printing, photocopying, scanning or otherwise without the written permission of the publisher, Total-E-Bound Publishing.

  Applications should be addressed in the first instance, in writing, to Total-E-Bound Publishing. Unauthorised or restricted acts in relation to this publication may result in civil proceedings and/or criminal prosecution.

  The author and illustrator have asserted their respective rights under the Copyright Designs and Patents Acts 1988 (as amended) to be identified as the author of this book and illustrator of the artwork.

  Published in 2009 by Total-E-Bound Publishing 1 The Corner, Faldingworth Road

  , Spridlington, Market Rasen, Lincolnshire, LN8 2DE, UK.

  Warning: This book contains sexually explicit content which is only suitable for mature readers. This story has been rated Total-e-melting.

  ALL OR NOTHING

  Jessica Jarman

  Dedication

  To Claire and Chris—for all you do to make TEB an awesome

  place to be and for believing in me.

  Chapter One

  “Wow, he’s hotter than I remember.”

  Shannon Delaney followed her friend’s gaze and frowned. Holly was checking out Zac Malloy—best friend to Shannon’s husband and their current houseguest.

  “I wonder what he looks like in uniform. You know I love me a military man. Is he involved with anyone?” Holly asked.

  Shannon turned back to her friend. Holly stared at Zac like she could she was starving, and he was exactly what she craved.

  “Hol, be careful there,” she warned. “He’s hot, no denying that, but the man is just…” she struggled to find the right words, “intense.”

  “Intense can be good.” Holly chuckled, but sobered when she met Shannon’s gaze. “What’s up? Has he been bothering you or done something to piss you off?”

  “No, nothing like that. Hell, he doesn’t really talk to me. He’s been here for a couple of weeks and he’s maybe said five words to me.” Shannon shrugged. “Sometimes he’ll just stare at me, like he’s going to say something, then nothing. He seems happier on his own, that’s all. I mean, look at him now. Everyone’s here, enjoying the barbeque, and he’s standing away from the group, all by himself. He’s not even making an effort to fit in.”

  She glanced back towards the man in question and, as if he knew they were talking about him, found his gaze on her. Her heart skipped and her stomach tightened. That was the real problem—how she reacted to the stares. He watched her so intently. She half-expected him to pounce on her, and the sad part was the thought of it excited her. And that made her feel guilty as hell.

  “Have you talked to Nate about it?”

  At the mention of her husband, Shannon felt her face heat, and she looked away from Zac quickly.

  “No, of course not. Zac’s his best friend. I’m not going to whine about him looking at me. Besides, he’ll find his own place soon and will be out of here. So it really doesn’t matter.”

  “You know, maybe you’re being too hard on the guy, Shan,” Holly said. “He’s been out of the country for the past year and a half. Maybe he’s just doesn’t know what to say or how to start a conversation with you. Heck, he hardly knows you. You’ve been married to his best friend for a year, and the only time he’s ever seen you was when he was on leave for the wedding. Maybe it’s just awkward for him.”

  Shannon thought about it. Everything Holly said was spot on, and it wasn’t like Shannon had gone out of her way to welcome the man. Guilt settled heavily in her gut. This was her husband’s best friend, and she hadn’t even made an effort. She sighed.

  “You’re right. I’ve been a real bitch about the whole thing,” she admitted.

  “Well, no time like the present to change,” Holly said brightly.

  “What?”

  “Looks like the man is out of beer. Bring him a fresh one, and be your wonderful charming self. If not for Zac, then for your man.” She gave Shannon a small shove.

  Shannon sighed and headed over to the cooler resting on one of the tables. After grabbing two bottles and popping the tops, she walked slowly over to where Zac leaned against the back porch. Just be nice, she told herself. Give him the beer, make a little small talk, and all’s good.

  “Hey, you looked like you could use another cold one.” She held out one of the beers and smiled—a forced smile, but at least it was a smile.

  Without a word, Zac took the bottle from her. Shannon sucked in a shaky breath when his fingers brushed hers. God, what was it about this man that made her feel like a gawky teenager? He lifted the bottle to his lips and took a long drink. She struggled not to stare, but couldn’t pull her gaze from his Adam’s apple bobbing as he swallowed. Who’d have thought that would be sexy?

  Shannon licked her lips. “So, how are you doing?”

  He tilted his head to the side and studied her a moment. Shannon resisted fidgeting as his gaze swept from her face downwards. Her cheeks heated when it lingered on her breasts. Mortification filled her as her nipples peaked under her sundress. The corners of Zac’s mouth quirked up as he lifted his gaze back to her face.

  “I’m fine.” He straightened and took a step forward.

  Barely an inch separated them. Shannon focused on keeping her breath even, but refused to back away. She wouldn’t let him know he intimidated her. No way. She tilted her chin up to look into his eyes. The amusement in his dark brown eyes made her grit her teeth.

  “What about you, Shannon?” Zac slid a finger from her shoulder to her wrist. “How are you doing?”

  “I-I—” She stammered as his fingers danced over her pulse. “Stop.”

  He moved even closer until her breasts touched his chest. The linen of her dress abraded the pert tips, and Shannon bit back a groan.

  “Zac,” she pleaded and despite her resolve, stepped back.

  “Shannon.” He moved with her and circled her wrist with his hand.

  “You can’t do this.” She glanced around, and relief filled her when she saw no one was even paying attention to them.

  “Do what?” he murmured.

  “You can’t touch me like this and look at me like…”

  “Like what? How am I looking at you, darlin’?”

  Shannon’s stomach clenched at the warm tone and endearment. Stop, she scolded herself. He’s your husband’s best friend.

  “You know damned well how you’re looking at me,” she snapped. “And it needs to stop. I’m married to your best friend, for God’s sake. Nate would flip out if he found out you—” She stopped as a laugh rumbled in Zac’s chest.

  “You don’t know your husband very well,” he said with an amused shake of his head.

  She yanked her arm away from his caressing hand. “You’re wrong. I know Nate, and I know all about what you two used to do. He told me all about it. The sexual games, the sharing women. But that’s the past. I’m Nate’s wife, not some girl the two of you picked up at a club.”

  Zac didn’t say anything. He simply stared at her. Shannon squirmed under the intense look.

  “Just stop, okay? I can’t—” she dre
w in a deep breath, “I don’t want to ruin your friendship with Nate. It means a lot to him. I know that, but I can’t deal with this from you.”

  Still, he didn’t respond. He simply watched her with a little half smile. Damn it all, did he not get it?

  She turned to walk away. She scanned the large yard and froze when she saw Nate watching her from where he stood near the dock. Oh shit. He was too far way to see his expression. Had he seen her arguing with Zac? Had he seen Zac touching her?

  She felt Zac behind her before he even spoke. His hard warmth pressed against her back. Unbidden, heat settled in the pit of her belly. He rested his hands on her shoulders and leaned down. His breath whispered across her cheek as he spoke in her ear.

  “He’s picturing us together, right now. He’s imagining what it’d be like to watch me take you. To push that sexy little dress up to your hips and sink into your sweetness.”

  The heat in her stomach unfurled and spread, right between her thighs. Shannon pressed them together and wrestled to find something—anything—to say.

  “And the thoughts, the pictures in his head, don’t piss him off, darlin’. I guarantee you, he’s rock solid imagining what I’d do you. What we’d do to you.” His fingers tightened, digging deliciously into her flesh. “Are you thinking about it, Shannon? Can you imagine what Nate and I would do to you?”

  Oh hell yeah. Shannon shook her head immediately, cheeks flaming. Damn him. Damn her for letting him put that into her mind.

  “You’re wrong,” she forced out before walking away.

  * * * *

  A few hours later, Shannon stood in the yard after cleaning up. With a sigh, she raised her arms over her head to stretch tired muscles. Two large arms slid around her waist, causing her to jump and yelp. Nate’s chuckle next to her ear calmed her.

  She slapped at his hands. “Damn it, Nate, you scared the crap out of me!”

  “Sorry, baby.” He nuzzled her neck. “Hmm, you feel so good. I’ve been wanting to hold you all day.”

  Shannon moaned and let her head fall back, allowing him further access to her neck. The slide of his lips across her skin ignited a flurry of sensations throughout her body. He pressed forward, nestling his cock against her lower back.

  “Did you have a good time today?” he asked before sucking gently on her ear lobe.

  She struggled to grasp a thought, to form an answer to his question. He made it all the more difficult as he moved his hands up to cup her breasts. “God, Nate.”

  He laughed softly and plucked at her nipples, pinching, pulling, rolling them between his blunt fingertips. Pleasure arced downward, straight to Shannon’s clit. She pushed back against Nate, rubbing against his erection.

  She gasped when he stopped abruptly and spun her around. He captured her mouth with hers, plundering the depths with his tongue. Shannon closed her eyes and held on for dear life. Nate lifted her onto the table, never breaking contact with her mouth.

  “You’re so beautiful, Shan,” he murmured. He pushed her dress up her thighs and chuckled when he slid his hand between her thighs. “No panties? Good thing I didn’t know that earlier. I would have neglected our guests.”

  He lowered her until she lay on the table. Leaning over, he suckled her nipple through the fabric. Shannon buried her hands in his thick black hair, holding him fast where he was. He caught the sensitive tip between his teeth just as he grazed her clit with his fingers. Her hips jerked upwards into his touch and pleasure curled tightly in her belly.

  “Nate,” she cried, tightening her grip on his head.

  He trailed kisses along her breast bone to her neck. He used his lips, tongue and teeth to tease her skin. Circling her clit until she squirmed beneath him, he drove her higher and higher. Shannon spread her legs wider, desperate for more of his touch.

  “Nate, please.” She lifted her hips, pulsing against his hand.

  “Please what, baby? What do you want?” He traced her lower lip with his tongue.

  “In me. I want you in me.” She pressed a hard kiss to his mouth and nipped his lips.

  Nate shifted his hand and glided two fingers into her sleek sheath. “Like this?”

  Shannon’s pussy clamped around the digits, and she exploded as he stroked in and out. The orgasm flowed through her like hot oil. Every nerve ending vibrated with the release, and Shannon cried out against the onslaught. Nate didn’t let up. He continued to fuck her with his fingers, drawing out the sensations.

  “I need you in me. I need your cock, need you to come inside me,” she pleaded, rising up on her elbows.

  She reached for the waistband of his shorts and made quick work of the button and zip. Sucking in a deep breath, she watched as his thick cock sprang free. She circled the engorged head with her finger, catching the drop of pre-cum oozing from the slit. Meeting her husband’s gaze, she brought her finger to her mouth and savoured the salty essence of his arousal.

  With a low groan, Nate withdrew his hand from between her legs. He gripped her hips and pulled until her ass was at the edge of the table. Shannon watched as he grasped his cock at the base and positioned it at her entrance. She wrapped her legs around his hips and tried to pull him closer, anxious to have him filling her.

  Nate surged forward and buried himself in her pussy. Shannon gasped at the invasion, the slight pinch of pain as he stretched her, the overwhelming pleasure of having his cock in her to the hilt.

  “God, you feel so good, so fucking good,” Nate murmured.

  Pulling out, he waited a moment—until she was ready to beg—then slammed into her. He set a frantic pace. Shannon grabbed the edge of the table beneath her as he pounded into her. She loved that she drove him to this, to near desperation. Loved that he wanted her so much he nearly lost control.

  Nate released one of her hips and laid the heel of his hand over the bundle of nerves between her legs. He added pressure, rubbing in circles as he stroked in and out of her pussy.

  Shannon tightened her legs around him and arched her back as another orgasm swept over her.

  “Again,” Nate said between gritted teeth and quickened his thrusts.

  Her pussy clutched at his cock, spasming around the engorged shaft. Shannon felt him jerk within her and the hand on her hip tightened. She relished the small pain and lifted to meet his strokes. Impossibly, he seemed to swell even more inside her, until he burst. The force of his release pushed Shannon over again. She turned her head to the side, overwhelmed by the intensity. A movement caught her attention. She shifted her gaze to the upstairs window. Her inner muscles contracted almost painfully, sending another ripple of exquisite pleasure though her body, when she realised it was Zac. God, he was watching them!

  Nate collapsed atop her, and she wrapped her arms around him.

  “I love you, Shannon.”

  She couldn’t tear her gaze from the illuminated window where Zac stood. “I love you, too.”

  She pressed a kiss to Nate’s shoulder, overcome with emotions. Mostly guilt, because it wasn’t anger that filled her when she thought of Zac watching her and Nate making love. No, God help her, it was excitement, pure and simple.

  Chapter Two

  Shannon walked into the kitchen, yawning broadly. After a sleepless night—a night of jumbled, confusing thoughts about her husband and his best friend—she needed caffeine. God, she’d kill for a cup of coffee at this point. A smile kissed her lips when she saw the full coffeepot. Nate had made her coffee before he left.

  She grabbed an oversized mug from the cupboard and filled it. She inhaled deeply before taking her first sip. Closing her eyes, she leaned her hip against the centre island and tried to focus on her to-do list for the day. Her mind kept wandering, though, to their houseguest. She wondered if he was still in bed. Most mornings, she didn’t see him before the workday began. What did he do all day? She sincerely hoped looking for a place to live factored into his schedule.

  “Good morning.”

  Speak of the devil. Shannon open
ed her eyes and lost her breath at the sight of Zac—wearing nothing but a pair of cotton pyjama pants—before her. His hair was damp and mussed, like he’d just gotten out of the shower. She stared at his broad, tanned chest and dropped her gaze past his abs to where the waistband of the pants rode low on his hips. Before she could catch herself, she licked her lips.

  Zac chuckled and walked past her to get himself a cup of coffee. The gravelly sound grated on Shannon’s nerves. She set her coffee on the counter and tried her damnedest not to squirm under his gaze. Damn it, why? Why couldn’t she be cool and collected and…sane around him?

  “You look good,” he drawled as he lifted the mug to his lips. “All prim and proper.”

  Shannon glanced down at the black skirt suit she wore and shrugged.

  “You all prim and proper underneath?” When she started to walk away without answering, he continued, “I bet not. What is it, darlin’? Lace? Silk? You got a sexy garter belt and stockings under that straight-laced get up?”

  Shannon stopped abruptly. She’d been determined not to rise to the bait, not to react the way he obviously wanted. She didn’t want to admit his words turned her on, that her panties—silk ones, the bastard—were damp since she’d first seen him. She focused instead on anger. The good ol’ fallback emotion.

  She spun around. “What is your problem? I told you yesterday to stop. You just can’t help yourself, can you? Can’t stop acting like a horny teenager going after what he can’t have. That’s it, isn’t it? You can’t have me, so you’re bound and determined to make my life hell while you’re here.”

  Zac lifted a brow and remained silent.

  Shannon kept on going, unable to stop the words. “Did you have fun last night? Watching Nate and me? You came on to your best friend’s wife, so I suppose it shouldn’t shock me that you’d watch us have sex. Did you get off on that? Jerk off as you watched?”